Penis Leashes and Carrot Danglers (notes to my kids)

by Frank | Jan 10, 2013 | Dadhood

My little loves, I apologise, when you read this you will probably be a little bit older and “going what the hell is dad on about?” these notes to my kids are just the things I hope to remember to tell you as you grow up or when you’ve grown up. As parents these days are leaving it a little bit late to start having kids I can’t always guarantee I’ll be around. And, if I don’t get them down I will probably forget them being an old geezer and whatnot. So, first up:

Never let anyone lead you around by your penis.
As you get older you will experience the feelings of sexual attraction. Which is great. It’s normal, and absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, ever. However, you will meet the occasional person who is so attractive to you they make you go all weak at the knees, a bit silly about the head, and even make you lose your mind – so much so that all common sense will be forgotten (This goes for girls to. Just substitute the word penis for sexual desire).

So when a good-looking guy or gal in school or work has you under their spell and they ask, encourage, or cajole you into doing something that you wouldn’t normally do, ask yourself “is this what I really want to do, or am I being led around by my penis?”

Beware of carrot danglers.
This is related but not the same. Basically a carrot dangler is someone who tries to get you to do something now by suggesting that great things may happen in your future if you do this for them.

For example, “if you do this first piece of work for free there will be the opportunity for paid work down the line.” Or, “if you [sign this contract, marry me, do a little dance], only then,will everything be okay.” Or, “pass these exams, and you will get into the university of your choice.”

Sometimes you’ll just have to go with it, as in the exam example. At other times, as in the work example, you want to nail the agreement upfront. It’s not an opportunity for paid work unless they are obligated to give you paid work.

The fear of saying no.
People worry that if they say “No!” to someone that they will offend, upset or make that person not want to be their friend. But learning to say no to people is an essential skill to have and more often than not you won’t offend, upset or lose friends by saying no. Try it today, over something small, say when someone offers you a drink for example, if that person takes offence then you probably don’t want that sensitive soul as a pal anyway.

That’s the first lesson kids. I hope it helps. By the way you will inevitably be suckered by carrot danglers and have your sexual desires manipulated by someone at some point in your life. Don’t beat yourself up. Mistakes are how you learn.

I love you kids. Despite that there’ll be plenty more embarrassing notes to come.

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